and the truth is..

what's my painful pleasure?

not sex.

not diarrhoea. not picking my nose till it bleeds. and nope, not sticking a thumb into the erogenous zone when i wank.

'you are so beautiful, it hurts.' Pearl Habour

my pack of lies

finally, after decaying decades
i now lie on my bed, my vision slowly fades
the glass of my windows turning opague
everything around me
transmuting to darker shades

nope, i'm not feeling suicidal. just my usual bout of depression. i think i've lost my biggest motivation, and my ultimate distraction. which explains my absence from home, work, outings, and here. but i guess it's finally enough. i knew from the start i had no counter on this board, let alone the chance to roll a good number. so yep it's just all along the stubborn me, unwilling to play other games.

so i decided from today i should just work my ass off, go for my holiday, and yes show china bitches my sleeping dragon. =D